Analysing Stuff (When I'm Bored) and Weird Stuff That Happens

You know, sometimes when you're bummed out and feeling like you're spacing out...you see weird stuffs or things that you haven't really noticed. Stuff around you, people and more importantly yourself.

I'm often jabbering about some nonsense, and usually I do think things through but it comes out as jibber jabber. So, I sound like a passionate drunk at times, trying to convey a useless point to my friends who simply nod and smile. But this time, its different...Oh yes. Why? Well, the main reason is cos, I'm typing it out rather than saying it...So get prepared to get blown out of your minds with my astute observational skills...Rather eccentric, but that's me.

You know loads of people, by that I mean me and two or three of my friends, sit around observing people on the street or where-ever and notice: Why is it that in a couple, the dude is either good-looking and the girl isn't or the chick is hot and the guy looks naff...no offence. This enigma has caused my friends and I to wonder and wonder...till we wasted enough time thinking of something not that productive. Alas, I think I may have found it...eventho, I'm pretty sure someone has done so before me. Anywho...It's cos we're just comparing. The dude might outshine the lass, well cos he is just better looking...It's not because she's ugly...No, no. Other way around as well. She's just more attractive than him. He's not that ug...no wait...Hmm...maybe he is...But you get my point. Of course all this reflects on a person's physical aspect as opposed to character.

Wires. Those lines which connect electrical items, points, whatever. But how come they hate me? I'm not neat and tidy, I can admit that...But why the hell do they always tangle up whenever I keep 'em. What's worse is the fact that it takes me hours trying to untangle 'em. Have you ever been in a situation like me before: See an attractive girl, sit not so far from her and pretend to be cool. Only to be foiled by the fact that your wires are tangled up. Therefore it will take forever just trying to set 'em right. I mean...Geez, I look like a moron. 'Hey, you...how you doing? Yea...just untangling my wires...Yea...' No, that does not sound sexy or cool.

Another weird stuff that keeps happening is the fact that I'm a weird magnet. It's cool, cos there's always something surprising and excellently-out-of-the-blue. Ya, I made that word up. Anyway, I get weird people adding me on MSN. And they ask me even weirder stuff...If you wanna know, drop me a line or if you already know me you can ask. I don't want to soil this already dirty blog any further.

Finally the analysis of myself. This is rather self-indulging...but I've got the keyboard...But you do too...You know what I mean. For too long a word has crept up to describe me: Pessimistic. Parents and teachers have strung that word on me whenever I plan something, friends rain me examples of my pessimistic ways. It was alright until a couple of my closer friends told me that and what's worse was that girls said I was that as well. GASP! And quite a number...Yikes! But its not so much that I choose to be that way...eventhough I do see myself as such. It's more of a restraint to further myself...I always feel let down by my own misjudgment. I could do soo much more but heck...That'll teach me to procrastinate. Don't be like me...Just go for it eventhough its shit. I've changed and become more open...Not so much open, but loud and attention-seeking. I love attention but I'm always with a conflict within myself to be at peace. Irony. I rarely go out and I love to be alone. But when I do go out, I look silly and stuff. An example of my weird life is that my girl-friend is my Les Paul...She might not be pretty, no really...She got scars and is kinda dirty...but she's mine. By the way, her name is Patty...After George and Eric's ex-wife...Nevermind.

Wow...Today's read is a lot. I doubt many people have made the end... But If you did...Wow...You must be bored. Thanks anyway...Much appreciate y'all reading and to those 2 or 3 who read or follow my blog...Means alot, never said it, but thanks. Alot more rambling about my short comings and bad points in the future...What a way to advertise my blog...So stay tuned and alive to read more...Cheers!

Episode One: Ride To School

Wake up in the morning and go to school
Wiping your mouth with all that drool
Dragging your feet, you feel like a bum
Man, I shouldn't have taken all that rum

Sit at the table, stare at the wall
Your parents are worried, your teacher might call
Run off the exit and catching the bus
Hoping to miss the late morning rush

Tired and hanging onto the bars
Voom! pass the window, look at them cars
The dude next to you smell like a hog
But your minds gone, worked like a dog

You notice a sign, its an empty seat
But you give it up to the old sweet petite
Man, traffic is slow and your mind goes off
The driver ain't helping, you wanna tell em to bug off

Feeling wasted you get off your stop
All the kids in style and one has a mop-top
The chick you see at the side of your eye
Dude she looks hot, and man that ain't no lie

All the guys watching and hoping to impress
You laugh deep inside, they all should second-guess
A shout from a far, all heads turn around
"Damn its her boy-friend," you say looking at the ground

Here comes the next bus, forward to school
Damn its all packed, pfff...what can you do?
You squeeze your way through to the back of the coach
What the shit was that? Was that a roach?

After a few stops you take a seat
Beside you a girl with a bright coloured pleat
You take your chance you check her out
"Man, she looks nice!" as you tongue rolls out

She notices you staring and you quickly look away
Feeling so awkward, "WHY, why? Today?"
Everything starts off wrong you feel like a fool
"Great, she saw me. Now she thinks I'm a tool"

To get your mind off, you plug in your ear-piece
Maybe the songs are a sense of release
You peep through the window, everyone in a rush
And you wonder to yourself, "Life? Man, what's the fuss?"

Ahh! Finally, you reach your damn stop
You think to yourself, "Come on let's go! Chop-chop!"
Running to class, things can only be great...
A voice from behind says, "Khalis, your late"

Cool? Hmm....

Being human beings...or at least I think you are, we all have our own personal traits and behave as such and such during different situations. Now, time and again people have labeled other with their reactions and personalities. So commonly, some guys are cool and some gals are hot. Fair enough, we all have different views on people. But what is the criteria for being 'cool'?

Before I start, 'cool' can be used to describe personality and appearance. I dunno I make up the rules, I just do what every annoying person does: question it.

Anywho...Cool. What defines a person as cool? Is it a leather jacket dude with a fag between his lips, leaning against a wall. Looking at people through his dark shades, constantly combing his greasy hair with his fingers? Or maybe a flamboyantly dressed female with either a brightly coloured vest or a dark clothes to look very chic and cool? Well, cool has been associated with style and I'm giving some very bad examples...sorry, I'm not really very now and hip.

But, I feel 'cool' should be something more than what you wear. It's who you are. Basically, you're either cool or an asshole to me. Simple. Even people labeled as 'Geeks', 'Nerds' or whatever are cool. Assholes, however, go about doing crazy shit to people and inevitably slow mankind's progress. Being nice and considerate is cool. Being a 'nice guy' is cool. You don't have to be the fittest jock...who I KNOW are assholes...a number of 'em are, to be 'cool'. I mean, I play guitar in a band...don't make me cool. Far from it. Being cool is how you handle your life and people around you. It's character and attitude. It's not what you wear or what you have achieved.

I mean little stuffs make you cool: giving up a seat on a public transport, being polite to others, being a gentlemen, (for girls) giving me your number and letting me go out with you...You know, there are many things. So just bear in mind, who gives a shit what people say, hold your chin up high, do the good thing and help others...that is cool. Even when people are being major dicks to you, screw them and carry on with your life...that's cool.

With that being said...I don't think, but I KNOW I'm super awesome and cool...yea...I sound like an asshole now...Damn.

My First Poem

Today's blog will be insane
Do not worry, I'm still the same
For reading this you will uncover
A rhyming pattern you will discover

For you see I am quite bored
O help me now, my sweet lord
Bring me joy, bring me fun
Or at least bring forth to me someone

For that matter, I do now add
For somethings in life that are quite sad
The one you like you often hide
Watching them from your side

But now you see she might have another
By this of course, I meant: a lover
But I do not cry, I do not quiver
Alas, you see she might have a sister

But for some its more than pain
Their tears now fall just like rain
For when the time they might find out
Love's time for them is running out

Blah blah ble ble blu blu ba
Be Boo Ba be de de ta da
I couldn't think of something that rhymed
So I wrote that to stall some time

As guys, we often sit and share
Our thoughts on girls we do compare
Alas all those names we calls
Talk to her? Hah! We have no balls

Understanding what you see?
Brother it ain't easy just trust me
For girls emotions run like tides
You can't read her lyin' eyes

Often we do contemplate
Hours on end we predict our fate
But time seems short and not so long
Take a match bra and smoke a bong

But for now, time is short and I hear my friends shout
For their patience with me is running out
So bye bye my friends all this talk feels like years
Catch you later, its Khalis...Cheers

Emotions, Sweet, Raging Can't Get Enough Of Screwed Up, Emotions

If you made it pass the title, well done! Being an adolescent sucks ass. Not only are we being constantly reminded of the dangers of our surroundings, but we are also forced to deal with unnecessary biological and psychological changes.

Biologically we have to face anatomical and facial catastrophes. For example, we stink. And to all the jocks out there... Yea, even though you love showing off yours abs and whatever you body can achieve with all the free time you have, please refrain from wearing too little or no clothes at all. Yes. You too have odors. Having said that. Other natural disasters include: the breaking of one's voice, however sexy it may seem it does get annoying, the growing pimples which erupt when one's dormant... Geddit? Forget it. Anyway, I can get a slight idea of what people meant when they say that before adulthood, one must go through the difficult process and blah blah. Well, I think what they meant was puberty, with the pimples and the whatever.

Wots worse than having a smelly body with erupting volcanic pimples? The mind of a teenager. All that mental jibber jabber and emotional roller coasters. I mean everything has a really sucky feeling.

Love for example. Often mixed with crushes or premature emotional state of love. But when you have that feeling, it brings you down. The whole process of getting to get the one who fancy to notice you can really bring you down. You have to play the game of anticipating her reactions and the anxiety toils and turns you inside, pulling you down. Then almost-intuitively, you doubt yourself and wonder if she is the one. You doubt her acceptance of you... Rejection is thy name, be humbled upon my arrival. Yet, you see and feel a glimmer of hope. Her smile, her presence and acknowledgment of your presence sends a beam of light onto you. That glimmer of hope gets you up and the will burns on. But with the two contrasting emotions that turmoil inside of you make you hurt and wreck you from inside. The colliding feelings inevitable hurting you. The euphoria being pulled down by melancholy, quakes through your heart and you feel yourself distancing away from her. The room suddenly feels claustrophobic as your heart sinks inside of you and the room narrows in on it.

Another feeling which defines your adolescent-hood, is the fact you want to be alone. You lament on how no one understands you. This doesn't always happen, but it does creep in once in a while. Ironically, you do need that someone and you don't know how to handle these to contradicting feelings. Bummer. You crave to be alone at times away from it all but you do need that someone to talk to. That close friend, or bud. That's when the trust issue surfaces. You either become to open or you hardly trust that dude. Or maybe your openness and friendly nature will be your downfall and you have difficulties accepting new people. Who knows?

Those are some of the things we pay for, for growing up. All the this and that emotional and biological frenzies we go through. Can really get to one, dude. But what I say is...Bra sit back and enjoy the ride.

Huh...Wondering Again

Now, we all claim that we cherished our loved ones and really can't stand to see them in pain. We tend to express endless love towards them and our mouths tend to be a fountain which words of love and so on come from. Thus many people I have spoken to wish to perish before their loved ones because they can't stand to see them suffer or die. But thinking about it... It is a selfish wish.

Well, now... If you really do love 'em, then you should want to die after all your loved ones. Why? Firstly, they would say the same about you dying. They would say that they wouldn't be able to go on without you. So, shouldering the pain is both admirable and more worthy of showing love towards them. Dying sooner than these people would be the easy way out. Almost cowardly.

Secondly, if you do believe in God or a/many super-natural beings, then retributions and paying of sin would also be a factor of dying after them. Again, why? Because living longer means more sins to commit or will be committed hence if your loved ones die before you, the lesser sin for them to commit or commit further. Even though, of course, you still screw your own life... but who cares, its about the ones you cherish, eh?

That Lump in Your Throat

Don't you just hate that depressed and beat down feeling? The one that makes you feel you're not good enough for anything? That something deep inside you that won't stop hounding you down and preventing you from feeling good about anything? That lumpish and ground pulling feel. Those things which you often hate and wish to eradicate.

Sometimes that sickly disturbance from inside you can really drive you off the edge. But most of the time, dealing with it can drive you nuts. For me, its mostly caused by people around me. Most of the time I dig the earth, while others control me or judge me on how I do things. Those are the kinda things I hate. I hate to be controlled. And I hate to be judged by people who don't really know me.

I am the type of person who can't stand a life without freedom. Eventhough I'm single and very much by myself all the time, I often feel constraint. I feel barriers are closing on me and I must get rid of the chains which oppress me. Sometimes it could be parents, others school or friends that make me feel this way. But whatever it is, its pulling me down.

I feel that doing something and appreciating work takes time and patience. No deadline or order can make work better or more outstanding. Creativity and effort are precious and cannot be forced. People have their way with things. They might be brilliant in something but fail in another area. Therefore when I feel pushed around and are abused by people and their naive natures, I...hate them. I seriously hate people who show ignorance and do not appreaciate the value of people. I hate people who under appreciate efforts of individuals who sacrificed thier time on things they have commited to doing.

I have many instances. Projects; stuff thrown at me and I clean stuff up. After all those sleepless nights, I get pressured by members of my team who scrutinize my weaknesses and over-look my achievements. Those my friends are idiots, whom I wish the best for. Other types of ignorant people are imbecile who judge you by how you appear. These people feel superior because they don't eat with their mouths open and use tissues instead of towels. These people do not realise how ridiculous they actually appear; eating fish and chips with chopsticks and blatantly calling you off for what you stand. Their ignorance often makes them feel intellectually superior whilst they go around making remarks, endorsed by themselves, claiming to be true. These imbeciles are everywhere and are closer to you than you think.

You might be reading this and saying, geez whoever wrote must be an asshole or have no friends. 'What an arrogant bastard...writing about himself.' That might as well be the case. But if you were me, you might feel that your silence must be broken and now is the time to start being honest. Many times I smile, but don't feel incline to now. Practical jokes are still the agenda and so are rude remakes, but anything personal and you'll pay for it cunt.