Makes Me Wonder...

You know, day-dreaming don't make you stupid or a time waster. The latter maybe...but its good to day-dream and wonder here and there. Inspirations come from moments of bliss...another words, it comes from when your slacking or it comes to you unexpectedly. It also makes you think... Think about stuff that you often ignore.

Scenario 1) Love and Finding Your True Love

I'm not desperate...but I am single. But its kinda the same thing...anyway...my friend once told me that he'll wait for his one girl. The girl who'll supposedly be the one. One in the sense of soul-mate and true love. Anyway, it got me thinking... What if everyone did have a true love. However no one will ever meet or even know about him or her. What if, your true love existed but in a different time? Due to the fact that the Earth has been around for a long time and during the course of time, every two persons have a bond. A bond of love or whatever. However those two will never meet because both of them were born in different times. Its really romantic thought but what if its true? Quite a bummer...

Scenario 2) No Two Things Are The Same

I dunno if they actually did something on this but...what if what you think something is not what the other person is interpreting...Confused? Same...What I'm trying to say is...what if what you see and heard and taste differs from everyone else...What if what you taste is sweet, another might interpret it as sour and another as bland or spicy... What if what you saw in your eyes is different form what others see...Imagine you see a human and the human has humanoid figure...but what if another person's brain saw humans as dinosaurs, or in the shape of dinosaurs...and another person saw humans as cats or something...Because, what you taste or feel or see is basically how your brain interprets it. So what if what you've been seeing isn't the remotely the same as everyone else and so on. Hmmm...If you didn't get that, just nod your head and pretend you know what I'm saying...

Scenario 3) Death

They say that when you die, your life will be flashed back in front of your eyes... What if that really did happen and that instead of highlights of your life being shown... What if your whole life was put on show and that every single bit of your life was put in front of your eyes... Well what if that happened and you died... Even when you die, you wouldn't know because your life was set to rewind and play again and you might think that your living in reality, but in actual fact it is a retold story and that one's mind does not comprehend fiction from reality. You are basically reliving your life in your head for all eternity... What if that were so? Wouldn't it be scary? Then wouldn't fate be inevitable because you are basically an audience of your life however you are so engrossed within the show that you think you can control the character that is you. Only to find it difficult because you cannot.

Music Scene In Singapore, by someone who doesn't seem to know alot about it

Music scene in Singapore. More scene than music. Yes, that is true. Loads of guys leaning to pop music and having no identity. WARNING: This article is really subjective and bias...Do not read if you are easily offended. Really...I'm warning you!

If you are reading this...its either you can't listen to instructions or you really can't be bothered and have loads of free time...Well, anyway...Music in Singapore is very mixed. Mixed in the sense that you have very strong sides in which voice their opinion. For example...the only way to fucking survive as a musician is to play fucked up boring tradiotional songs. Either that or to play the screwed up aristocratical show-off opera music. Why am I so tough on these genres...well, I'm not happy with the fact 'child prodigy' is a term given to children who can play classical music. Why can't heavy-metal musicians who are teens be labelled as 'child prodigy'? Why? Is it because the person who labels them as such is a bias old hag who feels that children who are inclined toward their, their meaning the old person's music, is therefore applicable to that term?

Come on honestly...Blues guitarists Jimi Hendrix, Jimmy Page and Don Felder made their mark from not so fortunate backgrounds. Those fellas had to be self-taught and learn the trade by their teens. They couldn't afford to be classically trained, yet their impact on music is fucking bigger. Eventhough they acheived fame later in their lives, they have impacted future generations. Yet however, people are still claiming to be progressive and all that crap but still are more inclined to favouring some boy or girl whose family could afford an education on music which bores people. You argue...o, you are to hard on this music...but honestly, how many of you actually listen to Mozart or Bach or Vivaldi? I have and I am lucky to even be here typing this...I thought I'd never be alive.

If you want flair and musical prowess...listen to Jazz or Blues. Jazz musicians have so much flair that will bedazzled by their improvisational skills. Same with blues...These types of music do not have to be beautifully composed on a piece of paper and made correct till there is no life. No! Jazz and Blues is strictly improvisation. How the piece makes you feel you play it. You don't need an orchestrator who is ridiculously paid to tell you how a note should be played. No! You decide and play it as you feel. Expression is what they orchestrator is paid for...he basically shows you how to express the piece...well therefore if he is getting paid for that, why not you show your own feel of the piece? How? By playing Blues and Jazz.

Another thing I've noticed about music here is the sense of identity loss. People here are zombies who know noting of other genres till a new genre becomes mainstream or 'pop'. Now its Indie music...why? Cos teens here are only aware of MTV and Billboards. Its not MTV's fault...Its the teens. Why can't they have their own mind and choose what they wanna hear? Instead of some DJ putting a record on which is mildy popular overseas and then someone claims that the song is great and others follow in. Its bonkers! If you really appreciate Indie and are a big fan...I salute you. But to those who are just innit for the crowd...Buzz off. Honestly...If you wanna know the most honest music, by the way...its Metal. I'm not a fan of Metal but I appreciate its honesty. If the singer is pissed...he'll sing it pissed. It simple and crystal clear.

Some people are pathetic...they don't even realise music existed 5 weeks ago. All they know is what's hot and popular. By the way...I never really liked "Hey There Delila" or whatever. I thought "Vincent" or listening to Cat Power was miles better. But..hey...that's just me.

Being a guitarist or guitar player sucks ass now. It used to be...O, I play guitar thank you. You could get away feeling smug...but now you see shit loads of novice players. Its not that I don't like them, its just its damn lame now knowing that there are others how share the same skill as you do. But what I do like about that is...I'm different. I'm a follower of Blues. So, my foundations lie on Blues...Not many Blues guitarists in Singapore. I might not be one of the best...not by a long shot...but at least I have a sense of identity. Loads of guys carry guitars claiming how good they are...but if you jam with them...you get more fun talking to an egg. They really have no knowledge of playing their own songs or improvising. All they depend on is a computer screen to direct them on which string and fret to press. All they know is chopping strings up with harsh struming and power chords. I should know...I'm not a good guitarist but I do know my basics and I know basic and common scales and all that stuff...but when I jam with people who claim to be good guitar players...they haven't got a clue what a scale is. Its mad!

After all this and that...I have to say...I see now why classically trained musicians are better in life. At least they know their shit. Its not a fad for them. Unlike all the rest who go...O, I like this song and ooo, I like this one better. But what I want is to see a talented group rise and become successful from Singapore. I don't mean Electrico...honestly do you know any of their songs? If you do...sing it. No? Fine, see my point. But for now...its still all a dream. More like a nightmare to be honest...I always wanted to be a session musician...but looks like I'll end up an animator or something I don't enjoy.

Being Mixed Blood(ed?)

Well, there are great things to learn about your hieratage and past. I've learnt that mine is from all over the place. Coming from a scattered background would sound interesting and wonderful, but trust me its really confusing and difficult...you'll see.


Anyway, I'm a mix of Malay, Indian, Thai and Chinese. Mix those up and you get...pfffff....voila me. Not something to be proud of but...So, my paternal side's mainly Malay with some Indonesian hieratage or something like that. Then my maternal side's the tricky one. My maternal grandfather's roots lay in Southern India and grandma's got Chinese and Thai roots. So basically that makes me....confused. And the really weird part is my second language, along with my brother, is French. Go figure...


Anyway, language is also a problem. Despite the fact that I speak French, I don't speak any of my forefather's languages. Well, I do know Malay...but really miniscule. The weird part is people think I'm Chinese. On the streets, unsuspecting aunties come to me speaking in Mandarin. I just look like an idiot just smiling hoping something would happen. They often say: "lai boy..." and drift off in their native tongues...while I stand gobsmacked and smile like a fool. I don't mock them, I smile because its nice...you know a consolation like: Sorry I don't know what you're saying but here's a friendly smile.


Another strange part is people trying to guess you're background during conversations or dinners. "Are you local?", "You're Malay? Chinese?", "Are you gonna finish that?" or whatever...It's nice to get attention, I have to admit. Anyways, people start guessing you're background with your facial features or the way you talk. I'm not good-looking...but for some reason, people analyze my features. Its almost like they're deciphering a code which is located on my eyes, nose or mouth. Again, its flattering...but when a girl does that, I feel like saying: You really have low taste, don't you honey?. Another thing...I speak differently from most people from my country. I don't always use certain terms like 'la' or whatever...but by god...I do swear, and I'm proud to say it! But just not here tho... Religion aswell...loads of people tell me that they could have never have guessed I am from the religion I am from...even me. They go.."NO! Really? I wouldn't have ever knew that..." Doesn't really matter...I follow the rules and stuff...but I'm not a REAL practicing person of my faith.


There you go...that's the fun of being mixed blood. You'll definitely get attention that's for damn sure. And the confusion and communication breakdown with people who mistake you for a person of a different race is sometimes really funny...having them confused is not nice, but its still worthy of a laugh.

Why I Don't Go Out

First impressions always count, such a true thing. Everywhere I've been, everyone I've met has had their own judgment on me. Well, and visa versa. Sometimes things go smoothly and people think your great...other times not so.

Meeting new people can be difficult, because they got their own perception of you. You might think, "that was alright...he/she seemed nice" but that person might think otherwise. I should know, happens to me everytime. Especially females. Meeting them for the first time, I say hi or something and they give me the 'get away from me' stare...I'm hopeless. It's something I have...I just give certain people negative impressions of me. More specifically: woman everything...woman teachers, woman colleagues, female whatever...all give me the "who the hell are you" look or ignore me...it's sad. Friends tell me to go get a gal...are they serious?! I'm like a repellent...So if you don't want Hillary to win the elections, just bring me to America and she'll just move back to her hometown in Mars. So if you know me and are wondering why I spend my time at home with the bloody guitar...you know now.

On another note, good-looking people always get others going easy. I've noticed that a good-looking guy or gal seem to get helped, in small situations, when they need to. For example, when one of them ask for directions or some minor help people tend to help them. Or if in a group if one of them speaks...the whole room turns silent. And when I chuckle at this...eyes turn at me red and angry...only to turn back and melt at the complextion of the handsome or pretty speaker. But I'm not putting down these good-lookers...heck I help them too. But sometimes it goes really over the top. I've sat in for lectures or talks or whatever...whenever theirs an attractive speaker all eyes look forward. All that is spoken is heard, eventhough it's crap or badly put...all attention is focused onto that person. You could here the wings of a fly or a pin fall. Claps and applauses...even praises can be heard from the other end. Unfortunately, in class or groups...when its my turn...I would have to fight for my voice and do a dance so I can even have a glimmer of their focus.

So that's why I spend my weekends at home playing my guitars or attempting that contraption called "pe-ah-no". It also sucks to be me because I've been travelling here and there and never really settled down to have friends...as in close friends who've been with for a long time. So that's also another reason why I don't go out. And when I do go out...its normally alone, I dunno why I still watch movies alone. People call me a loner sometimes or private...I call myself Khalis. There are positives to being me though...you visit loads of places and get to perfect your musical skills...I don't mean to brag but I think I'm kick-ass at Blues...oh yea.

Newer Generations Are More Laid-back

Well, the title is often the issue when it comes to doing work or being more proactive. Parents or older people would nag, and for good reason, force the younger ones to be less laid-back and do more stuff. This, if you think of it, has been going on since the dawn of time.

Every generation blames the newer one for being less proactive, more lazy more bla bla. Well, it is true because every generation has its own inventions and other stuff. The current generation is criticized for being too lazy because of 'compuhtah' and 'techmologi'. Well, let's put it this way, I bet the older generation would be as lazy as we are if they had what we had. With the exception of certain sports of course, this is true with video or console games.

Due to technological advances, life has been made easier. It's easier to have fun and to stimulate ourselves. However, the sight of people having things easy is ofthen confused with them being lazy. That's where I think the issue of lazy generations coming in to place.

Also, if you think of it, I bet the older generation were accused of being to laid-back by their previous generations. So, this whole cycle has been going on for ages. If an older person were to tell me or accuse me for being too lazy, my responce: So? I know I am lazy...It's actually your genration's fault for our whole lazy persona because your generation created TVs, Computers, Video Games so really its your generation's ambition that made us how we are today.

But that being said, the cycle will continue. We would view our children as lazier than ourselves and they would accuse their kids of being more lazy and so on.

Therefore people's accusation of this issue is really piontless...that's what I think.

Religion: Lost Of Faith

In 2001, there were 2.1 billion Christians, 1.5 billion Muslims, 900 million Hindus, 380 million Buddhists and many more others. These were the number of people 'active' in the major religions in the world. As of now, countless billions more will have entered Christianity and Islam and Hinduism would have entered the billion zone. However, are these people of these fantastic faiths misunderstanding the correct terms of religions? Are these people losing the true meaning of their faith and faith itself?

All religions, not cults, preach on the values of life and the life hereafter. Many have prophets, others deities and some use messiahs to lead them to the path of good. Putting it bluntly, all religions want their followers to be morally good people and to be happy with their lives. Alas, then why is everybody, or at least most of the people I know, tend prefer or do the opposite? Why do loads of people tend to see the negative sides of religions. Not in the sense that religions are wrong and all that, but in the sense that they use religion as a medium or tool to instill fear? You dig?

I was brought up in a religion and many teachers(?), I dunno what to call them, abuse the stories of this particular faith and terrorize us kids with tales of how we will be so and so or else end up in hell or whatever. They are suppose to guide us and teach the religion in a way that is reasonable and well, the way it was meant to be taught. However, many of these older wise folk, tend to focus on the bad side of religion: the punishments. They tend to scare little kids with tales of how one is punished if one does something wrong. They think that by doing so, those little kids will be frightened and not commit religious crimes or whatever. Instead, the opposite is done. When those little kids grow up and under the influence of their religious teachers, they feel frightened about their faith and ultimately deny it.

All these people who have denied their faiths or rejected the whole idea of religions have done so because of their up-bringing. The up-bringing not by the enviroment of kids their age, the whole gang thing, no...instead their teachers, and to a lesser extent parents, have not taught their children the right stuff about their faith. They do not tell them about the good things about their religions, they do not teach about the flexibilities or certain morals about the religion instead they use stories to terrorize the kids and make them scared. They avoid the important stuffs in religions: being a good and happy person. Instead under their method, they produce:morally good but frightened people. Thus if you have a frightened person, that person is naturally defensive and their mindset towards things are negative. Therefore they lead a conscience or subconscience life of negativity. Also a frightened person would want acceptance. And they would take any opportunity to be accepted to any, and I mean ANY, society or group. Thus, this is where the whole idea of people neglecting their faith and turning bad is brought up.

Therefore, what I'm trying to say is, loads of people, especially the older generation, complain that the younger generation has lost their faith. They complain and criticize the younger people and do whatever old people do. However, I say: The reason for this lost of faith is the up-bringing of these younger people. They can complain that the up-bring is destroyed due to gangs and TV and whatever. But weren't they children or kids of some family? Not all of them were born to gangsters off the streets. They were children of decent people. However, when the matter of religion came, they weren't nurtured the proper way. Their teachers taught them wrongly and they didn't go with the programme. The more the teachers forced them to accept something...the more the young people rejected. Therefore, the lost of faith and interest of faith is brewed.

Call me bias to the younger generation, but I am cos I am them. I was brought up in a way that made me unhappy about my faith. I often questioned my faith. But I realised that it wasn't the religion...it was the people who taught me. They taught me what they wanted me to know, not what I wanted or was supposed to know. So lemme just finish off by saying that often you have to look at both sides to understand the problem and that society and up-bringing plays an important role in everything.

Further more...I don't think prophets, God(s) or messiahs meant for religions to be taught the way its taught now. They probably want people to embrace it not be forced onto it.