Why I Don't Go Out

First impressions always count, such a true thing. Everywhere I've been, everyone I've met has had their own judgment on me. Well, and visa versa. Sometimes things go smoothly and people think your great...other times not so.

Meeting new people can be difficult, because they got their own perception of you. You might think, "that was alright...he/she seemed nice" but that person might think otherwise. I should know, happens to me everytime. Especially females. Meeting them for the first time, I say hi or something and they give me the 'get away from me' stare...I'm hopeless. It's something I have...I just give certain people negative impressions of me. More specifically: woman everything...woman teachers, woman colleagues, female whatever...all give me the "who the hell are you" look or ignore me...it's sad. Friends tell me to go get a gal...are they serious?! I'm like a repellent...So if you don't want Hillary to win the elections, just bring me to America and she'll just move back to her hometown in Mars. So if you know me and are wondering why I spend my time at home with the bloody guitar...you know now.

On another note, good-looking people always get others going easy. I've noticed that a good-looking guy or gal seem to get helped, in small situations, when they need to. For example, when one of them ask for directions or some minor help people tend to help them. Or if in a group if one of them speaks...the whole room turns silent. And when I chuckle at this...eyes turn at me red and angry...only to turn back and melt at the complextion of the handsome or pretty speaker. But I'm not putting down these good-lookers...heck I help them too. But sometimes it goes really over the top. I've sat in for lectures or talks or whatever...whenever theirs an attractive speaker all eyes look forward. All that is spoken is heard, eventhough it's crap or badly put...all attention is focused onto that person. You could here the wings of a fly or a pin fall. Claps and applauses...even praises can be heard from the other end. Unfortunately, in class or groups...when its my turn...I would have to fight for my voice and do a dance so I can even have a glimmer of their focus.

So that's why I spend my weekends at home playing my guitars or attempting that contraption called "pe-ah-no". It also sucks to be me because I've been travelling here and there and never really settled down to have friends...as in close friends who've been with for a long time. So that's also another reason why I don't go out. And when I do go out...its normally alone, I dunno why I still watch movies alone. People call me a loner sometimes or private...I call myself Khalis. There are positives to being me though...you visit loads of places and get to perfect your musical skills...I don't mean to brag but I think I'm kick-ass at Blues...oh yea.